2003-10-14

Men, Dating and Junk

Met some interesting characters recently. None of them from the US mind you. I guess I find them interesting because they find me gorgeous and THEY LIVE HERE!!!!! woohooo! hehe Has my time for meeting meaningful and lasting relationships arrived??? OMG I'd better not breathe. OF course I pop onto Yahoo... and everyone on my buddy list signs off *sigh* I stink or something.

Walked the stairs again today and finally my legs don't hurt and I can walk without appearing to be 90 years old. I'm starting to see the benefits, too. I've lost 12 pounds since I went to Toronto and I think I'm about to lose 175 more when I tell Doug I can't take his apathy anymore. He can go a whole week without emailing me, calling or showing any sort of concern about how I am when I sit here and wonder if he's laying dead in the street because he won't answer the phone (come to find out it's broken) or that he won't answer email (he's ever so busy). I should have known better than to think that he was ready to start something again. I will never be any kind of priority to him and the sooner I realize this and deal with it, the happier I will be and the quicker I can move and and get over him once and for all. This all makes me terribly sad. I have done such unbelievably stupid things over that man that I adore. And he notices, but it's of no consequence, or so it seems. :(

Christmas party quickly approaching and Wishy Washy Guy says he'll be my date, but I know better than to count on him. I have a "reserve" date in the wings just in case. WWG is always so convincing right up to the minute he says "Kelly don't kill me/hate me/be mad at me" hehe But he's just so damn funny and we have a million laughs when we hang out. I just like him. Not in love with him or anything. Just one of those friends you do semi-date stuff with. No kissing, no hand holding, but you can have a drink and a laugh and flirt a little big and go home feeling just fine :)

I broke down and joined a "real" dating service. They interview you personally and then match you up through email and online profiles. I have my "interview" tomorrow. I'm not sure yet that I will join, but taking this step has made me feel a little better. I'm sure once I find out how much it is, I will decide NOT to join LOL But they have once a month parties and take trips and do junk like that. Something organized is better for me than guessing at internet bullshit all the time. At least I think it is. LOL

Well, time to review Aubrey's homework and practice spelling words and junk. Nite all.

kellbelle at 7:38 p.m.

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